The jury found that Heard defamed Depp on three of three counts in Depp’s lawsuit, and that Depp’s lawyer Adam Waldman defamed Heard on one of three counts in Heard’s countersuit. The jury awarded Depp $15 million in damages, and Amber Heard $2 million. The trial has gotten people talking about domestic violence, including the signs of abuse and what a victim looks like. Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence, say experts at Mayo Clinic. How can you know if you or a loved one is experiencing abuse? You may be a victim, per the Mayo Clinic, if you have a partner who:
Insults you, calls you names, or puts you downStops you from going to work or school or seeing family or friendsControls what you wear, how you spend money, or when you can see a doctorConstantly shows possessiveness or jealousy, or accuses you of cheating on themBecomes angry after using drugs or drinking alcoholThreatens you with a weapon or physical violenceForces you to engage in nonconsensual sexBlames you for their behaviorThreatens to out your gender identity or sexual orientation to people around you
Allison Young, MD, an adjunct professor of psychiatry at the New York University Grossman School of Medicine in New York City and a psychiatry medical reviewer for Everyday Health, discussed what we can learn from the Depp v. Heard trial about the complexity of abusive relationships, who can be a victim, and how to get help. Everyday Health: As a psychiatrist, what do you think about how the issue of domestic violence has been represented throughout the Depp v. Heard trial? Do you have any concerns about how victims watching have been affected? Dr. Young: I think this very heated and complicated court case has highlighted that there’s no such thing as a perfect victim of domestic violence. Many people who experience one trauma, such as an abusive relationship, later experience another trauma. It’s also very common for people who have experienced trauma to later develop depression, anxiety, or another mental illness, or to self-medicate with substances like alcohol or drugs. Something that has harmed victims of domestic violence in the past is that these things are almost always used against them in court if they try to seek justice against their aggressor. Obviously, it’s traumatic to experience domestic violence, but an ensuing court case can add another layer of trauma on top of that. I think this case has shed light on the fact that you can have imperfections and faults but still be the victim of domestic violence. You don’t have to be fault-free to deserve freedom from your abuser or to deserve justice for the abuse you’ve been subjected to. RELATED: 10 Celebrities Who’ve Been Touched by Domestic Violence EH: There’s been a lot of talk about reactionary abuse, especially how it relates to the misconception of the perfect victim. What does the term “reactionary abuse” mean? AY: I haven’t heard of this term before, but here’s what I think it likely means: I have treated victims who have hit or pushed their abuser in fights, either in reaction to that fight or in self-defense. Many people will say, “If they feel strong enough in that relationship where they can be aggressive, too, are they really in an abusive relationship?” The answer is yes. In abusive relationships, there’s a power dynamic in which one partner exerts control over the other partner through physical violence or often emotional violence. Sometimes it could be the mere threat of violence. Sometimes it could be a single incident of violence that’s then held over one partner’s head. And then sometimes, it’s one partner constantly berating and putting down the other partner and making them believe they can’t make it on their own outside the relationship. And all of those scenarios are abusive. The assumption that, because someone pushes someone back in a fight, they’re not in an abusive relationship, is a common misunderstanding. Even if the other person becomes physical, too, in response to violence from their partner, they may still be on the bottom of the power dynamic in the relationship. For example, there are women in jail now because they harmed their abuser in self-defense, but they were convicted of a crime in court because what they did wasn’t viewed as self-defense. RELATED: 5 Common Misconceptions About Domestic Violence EH: In your opinion, has all the buzz around the trial helped or harmed victims of domestic violence? What consequences, either positive or negative, might the publicity have had for them? AY: I think there’s been both positive and negative consequences. The positive is the recognition that domestic violence is a universal issue that can affect anyone. It’s brought awareness that abuse can happen in other dynamics. There’s a general assumption that abuse only happens to women, but not men, or that it only happens to women in heterosexual relationships. I think this trial has highlighted that men can be victims of physical violence within a relationship, too. One in 4 men have been the victim of some sort of physical violence from an intimate partner, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) states. Many men have felt more comfortable stepping forward online and saying that they’ve been the victim of an abusive relationship in response to hearing Johnny Depp say he feels he’s been a victim of domestic violence in his own relationship. Abuse can happen among lesbian or gay couples, as well as couples with at least one partner who is transgender. Fifty-four percent of transgender people have experienced some kind of intimate partner violence, such as physical harm or coercive control, according to the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey. However, I think the negative coming out of the trial is the very negative reaction viewers have had to Amber Heard. I think this could be harmful to victims of domestic violence, again, because of the myth of the “perfect victim” and the idea that for a woman or any other victim to seek justice, she must be likeable and without fault of any kind in the relationship. EH: Who is most likely to experience domestic violence? AY: Nearly one-third of women ages 15 to 49 around the world have been a victim of physical or sexual violence in a relationship, according to the World Health Organization. Although it does happen to men, too, statistics show that victims of domestic violence are overwhelmingly women. That gap widens even more when you look at the severity of abuse. Women are much more likely to be victims of severe abuse like strangulation and other forms of serious violence than men. Statistics from the NCADV show that 1 in 4 women have been victims of severe physical violence by an intimate partner compared with 1 in 7 men. Data also show that when a woman says she was abused, it’s rare that she’s lying. Studies show that the rate of false reporting is between 2 and 10 percent, according to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (PDF). It’s important to realize that, statistically speaking, women are more likely to be abused, and if a woman claims she was abused, it probably did happen to her. And again, the prevalence of intimate partner violence is also very high in the transgender community, with more than half experiencing some form of violence. EH: What are some of the best ways for people in abusive relationships to get the help they need? AY: This is very tricky, because many people say about victims, “Well, if they really wanted to get out of the relationship, they would’ve sought help.” It’s important to realize that victims may willingly stay in abusive relationships for several reasons, including the power dynamic, financial reasons, and fear of losing children they may have with the abuser. If you want to get help, a good place to start is telling your primary care doctor or a counselor. While doctors and counselors need to report child abuse to the authorities upon hearing about it, these sources are confidential for adults experiencing abuse and will help adults however they prefer to be helped. You could also reach out to a 24/7 domestic violence hotline for help. If you don’t feel comfortable with that, you could reach out to a trusted friend or family member and tell them what you’re experiencing. Having a plan and even writing it down and storing it somewhere safe where only you can access it, such as the sole of your shoe, is very helpful. A plan should include where you will go, who you will call, and what you will bring with you. The reason I think it’s helpful to write it down is because usually in a high-stress or violent situation, it can be difficult to remember these details. Your mind is not working. If you have your plan written down, you don’t have to rely on your memory to find the help you need. RELATED: 8 Resources That Offer Help for Domestic Violence
